Entries for November, 2007
*my nahuli daw na taga imus*
-my heart skip a deep beat when I recieved that text message.
*walang aminan ha*
-I know I can easily escape this shit..
Perfectionist people are hard to please.. In the future, I'll be facing a complicated one. Knowing that my parents won't agree with the decision that I'll be doing.
*You guys should end up either going on a mission or temple marriage*
-shit. I can't imagine myself doing any of this^^
*What age you are planning to settle down?*
-I guess at the age of 25 or beyond that.. (white lies)
*i think you're bluffing*
-no I'm not (a defensive reply) what should I be getting if I do lie?
-yep.. Iam lying. haha!
I know I'll fall deep in deep abyss again..
...soon.
But hey unconciously I love being in pain..
weird?
{ mood } frustrated
Posted by kidbaliw
why do we feel regret only in the end of everything?
tears can only help me ease the pain i'm feeling.
im so stupid to let go of someone whom i wanted to share most of my nights with.
it was raining so hard, we own the bed we share together. i hugged the stuff toy on his bed as he hugged me and gave me warmth. there were no words but only actions that danced through the music of rain.
his face was so calm when i first saw him the moment i opened my eyes early in the morning.
what a blissful night to remember.
so perfect that i wanted to be in the same situation again.. however i let him go.
we tried to work things out but i think due to all the hurtings and pride it didn't work.
i wish i could feel him again.. see his face again.. have that perfect dance we made with the rain again.
i thought i had moved on, it been year..
but i can't help but sober whenever i remember you.
you have a certain magic that took my breath away.. i hate you because i love you so much.
love really make everybody pathetic blindfool!
{ music } it's been a while by staind
{ mood } melancholy
Posted by kidbaliw
here i go again.. feeling the sober that i shouldn't be one.
why i just simply can't forget him that easily? i know i had moved on from his chains.. im so damn tired..
i do go out with other people, i even had relationships with other guys.. but why at the end of it all i wished YOU were those guys?!
am i that pathetic lovefool wanting for a love that will never be mine again?
i need help.. i feel like crying but i do hold my tears back.. he doesn't deserve this tears.. i already shed a river for him..
so damn tired of being this way..
struggling this pain im battling out for a year already.
is it true that the reason who made us cry will also be the one who will take away the pain?
enlighten me.
{ music } stuck in the moment by U2
{ mood } crazy
Posted by kidbaliw
i wanted to quit something but i know there is no way i can achieve it.
why there are so many restrictions just to please someone? do i really need to do that?
can i simply stay away from a life i was brought up to? like telling them on their face the word "quits"...
i feel like i have this chain for the rest of my life. they say it's good.. but for me?
im a prisoner.
{ mood } depressed
Posted by kidbaliw
*saying goodbye is never an easy thing..
a song that keeps playing in my mind.. arrg!
will love lead them back?
{ mood } frustrated
Posted by kidbaliw
My heart was crushed when I read a text which goes like this:
"Ingat ka ha... baka mapatay kita"
I felt like crying upon reading that message from him. I don't know what are his intentions when he send it to me. Is he still bitter? I thought he had moved on and told me that I can find better than him. Does he know that every day of my life he still occupies my heart? Hell no!
Love is really tragic one for me.
{ mood } crushed
Posted by kidbaliw
i feel so weak inside.. feel na feel ko tuloy ang mangyayaring reunion ng mga pusa.. Simpleng message from him it brings tears to my eyes. Hai! Ano ba itong nangyayari sa akin? Iniisip ko nga kung ano bang meron siya at nagkakaganito ako?
People around me may see me with a happy face pero the truth is, inside of me is bleeding.. so bad! Gusto ko mawala na itong nararamdaman ko. I can't put into words the depression I'm feeling right now..
kasi naman, bakit ka kasi nagpaparamdam? lalo tuloy ako hindi maka let go sa'yo.
{ music } people laughing within my account
{ mood } crushed
Posted by kidbaliw
nilalaman sa utak ng isang baliw
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