Entries for August, 2007
Life's bittersweet, has great power how it can turn beautiful things into jeopardy. We are falling in deep fire, vague hole that we can't escape..
People around you cannot feel the burning sensation that kills your soul. Like a bomb that exploded and you are the only one who felt that intensity.
Regret had slapped upon me, because of fear I lost everything. Special mention to those people I had given my heart and soul, even if I wanted them to be mine i cant because they're not my property. Every heartbreak I'd gone through helped me up to become a better person. Tears which are priceless shall fall 'only' for them, they had touched my life.
Wish I was weak enough not to let them go.. How I wish they were sensitive enough to feel that I loved them so much, giving their freedom against my will was a hard thing to do. I thought they had loved me, but I guess they never see my worth.
Iam also a human,needs to be love and be accepted. I have my own worth, shortcomings and dreams. Guess I can only whisper it with the wind that blew my dragon fly away.. which left me with memories that I'll forever cherish.. keep stabbing my heart, makes me half dead as I journey my life all alone.
{ music } dragonfly by spongecola
{ mood } gloomy
Posted by kidbaliw
It hurts...
It feels like I'm falling deep down in an abyss. I will always cherish that night you were beside me, hearing your heartbeat as we journey ourselves up in heaven. A memory that will sure bring me to melancholy.. I opened my true emotions to you, it's hard being naive... I need you.
Those places we've been together will remind me how sweet love is, music will fill my soul as I yearn for you.
Love brought me to hell as I let you go...
Guess we're only meant to be together for a 'moment' of time.
{ music } it must have been love by roxette
{ mood } lonely
Posted by kidbaliw
August 8, 2007
For the first time, I appreciated the heavy downpour of rain... It was a weird feeling though because for some reason, I hate rainy seasons! I was travelling my way home from work, it rained so bad.. so bad that I can't stop myself smiling that people wonder why I was behaving like that.
anyways, it was such a nice feeling.. i think in an instant i had finally moved on from his chains.. yipee! well I guess the closure did help for me to accept the fact that... *secret* the moving on process was like the first one who stole a piece of my heart, would you believe that in 3 days I manage to get rid that person out of my system?! but i think this one (recent one) is much more faster.. although it took me a year to finally speak up and be brave to open up my true emotions with him... well Im proud to say that in one night, he's already out of my system... I feel so free and so happy that he was gone.. 
I moved on so fast this time.. weee!
well I think im back in myself again. yipee! 
being single is so much fun!
i miss my bitch though, the coffee session we shared.. the moment we did a ceremony under the rain which was really unforgetable one for me.
OMG! I miss my bitch haha!
{ music } way back into love
{ mood } bouncy
Posted by kidbaliw
"love will always be the solution, you should keep your doors open when love comes"
"Iam not closing my doors though, I just wanted to give myself a timeout for love. Behind the open door, there is a huge wall that protects me from harm. Hehe!"
"I'll try to break that wall.."
"Stop hitting me, coz I won't bother in your 'style'... your a playboy right?"
"I was.. but now things are different now.." 
This are the words that kept me up till the dawn of morning. It was a fun conversation, we talked about things that strangers don't bother to open up. I don't believe in his words, why should I believe lips of a total stranger? 
Lets see if we'll get there.. After all both of us came from a not so good experience.. Maybe we need each other to heal.. need each other company..
as friends... ayt?
tomorrow we'll see,,,
{ music } chatters behind me haha!
{ mood } excited
Posted by kidbaliw
wala akong masabi ngayon..
naiinis ako! im soooo soooo angry! grr! wala akong masabihan.. gusto ko magwala.. magsusumigaw.. hay!
since this is my page, il say what ever I want...
letcheng mga customers yan.. they are so stupid! pasalamat sila at wala sila sa tabi ko kundi my sapak at tadjak sila sa akin..
tapos kailangan ko pa maging mabait.. paksyet!
*galit na kuting si watashi*
{ mood } angry
Posted by kidbaliw
I heard a sad news today, even if I wanted to cry.. I can't.
Even if I wanted to keep it, I have no power to do so because I'm a novice in the field. Changes... we can't control it because that's the constant thing in the world.
Now I have to live with it.
...Im scared.
{ mood } lonely
Posted by kidbaliw
...hmmm its been a while since i had a blog here.. actually i don't have enough time.. time to browse the net during my restdays...
anyways since i had the "time" then i'll try to write my thoughts here recently..
im a bit sleepy in a way because I don't have enough rest yet. so in case i had a wrong grammar with my sentences.. please bear with me.. haha!
these month is a really crazy month for me.. three special people had left my world.. I can't ask them to stay, that's the way how life works.. right? damn fucking changes..
anyways, even so I think I finally find myself to build myself up after the wrekage i had gone through during my teen years. no one sees the pain and angst that I had experienced.. maybe because I know how to hide it with my pearly whites..
I was having a break from a stressful calls when suddenly something had knocked me out and made me realized something.. time passes too quickly, i have my work.. i earn big bucks (hehe) getting too stressed and busy because of my work.. now i can hardly find time to go malling or doing the things "i usually" enjoy.. i kinda miss those things though..
i realized that I HAVE MY WORTH. I can't let anyone take that thing away from me. i had already dried my tears from all those things.. including acceptance for things that aren't meant to be "forever".
i'll just enjoy what life offers me right now. stop doing things that will lower myself.. making the right decision right now can create an effect in the future right?
i just hope that right now, i had done the right thing for the first time.
{ music } magic 89.9
{ mood } sleepy
Posted by kidbaliw
nilalaman sa utak ng isang baliw
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